This article is the second part of an article that was originally published twenty years ago in the print edition of the Israeli Yated Ne'eman. It is by a well-known (in Israel) master educator.
It is impossible to build a house without first planning the
number of rooms and floors and all the other details. In
addition, the engineer also has to plan the foundations, how
much iron to use inside the concrete, which type of concrete
to choose for the ceilings and which type for reinforced
walls. He has to make a sketch so that everyone can
understand his proposals. The actual planning stage itself
takes up a lot of time, everything being checked and double-
checked first. How much more so do our preparations for the
holy Pesach period require us to plan carefully and
beseech the Creator to make us succeed and guide us in all
our ways.
Adapting the Seder to the Level of the Participants
Let us now return to the Seder night and the chol
hamoed period. We shall not go into great detail about
this – books have been written about the topic by people
worthier than myself — but we do need to know how to talk
and convey ideas.
The Alter of Kelm, Rav Simcha Zissel zt"l, writes in
Chochmoh Umusar (vol.1, pg.162), that he does not
explain deep ideas to those who are not yet capable of
understanding them, because this will harm them. Even after
their comprehension abilities have matured, their
understanding of the point they heard about when they were
younger will be based on their previous level of
understanding, and they will fail to grasp the intended
meaning.
We find in Chazal a frightening example of this phenomenon.
When the messengers of the tribe of Dan reached the idol of
Micha, they met the grandson of Moshe Rabbenu, Yonoson ben
Gershom. Deeply shocked, they asked him what a grandson of
Moshe Rabbenu was doing there serving as a priest for
avoda zora. He replied to them, "I have the following
tradition form my grandfather’s family, `You should at all
times rather hire yourself out to idol-worship than be
dependent on the charity of others.'"
The gemora
explains that avoda zora in that context means work
which is "strange" to a person (seemingly undignified), but
he took it in the literal sense of idol-worship (Bovo
Basra 110a).
This teaches us how careful we have to be about what we say,
making sure not to express deep ideas which children are not
capable of understanding properly. We should rather stick to
simple things and use stories and parables. We are all
capable of doing this, since any idea can be turned into a
story or a moshol.
It is attributed to the Dubner Maggid that he was once asked
how he managed to convert all his ideas into such apposite
parables. He replied with a parable. A king once came to a
village. The king noticed a fence surrounding a villager’s
house. Each piece of the fence had a picture of a circular
target on it, and exactly in the middle of each circle there
was a hole. The king was immensely impressed with the
precision of this villager's shooting, and he wanted to
appoint him as his bodyguard or chief royal hunter. When the
farmer was told about this he laughed, and said, "Your
Majesty, I first made various holes by shooting at the
fence, and only then did I paint the circular targets."
It
is the same with me, concluded the Dubner Maggid, whenever I
have a thought on a particular posuk, I make up an
appropriate story to explain it.
Every story has its kernel, its frame which can be filled
with descriptions as the narrator sees fit. This point was
well put once by Rav Shraga Sinai, the Principal of Talmud
Torah Yesodei Torah in Tel-Aviv at a conference of group
leaders in Av 5748 (1948). He told the story of a
Yerushalmi Yid who collected stories about
tzaddikim, paying anyone who could come up with a new
story. Someone once came to him with a maase, and he
started to go into great detail: "The horses pulled the cart
with all their might, even though they were stuck in the
snow up to their necks, when suddenly in the distance you
could hear wolves wailing. The horses could already make out
the green sparks in the wolves' eyes in the darkness.
Terrified to their innermost being, they stood up on their
hind legs, and the coachman...
At that point the Yerushalmi
yid stopped him: "All that I can describe myself. Just
tell me what happened."
I think that, by using these two principles, we can explain
several ideas in story form, but it has to be remembered,
that, like everything else, this too requires preparation in
advance.
The Four Sons
The Four Sons mentioned in the Haggodoh are portraits
of extreme types. The chochom is interested in all the
halochos of Pesach, and the rosho denies
everything, but it has to be remembered that there are some
chachomim who are only interested in some of the
halochos, and some reshoim who are willing to
listen and argue, and even to be convinced. (Proof of this
is the number of baalei teshuva in our generation).
Not only Seder night, but the whole of Yom Tov
is earmarked for educating our children, and we have to find
the most appropriate way of talking to a particular of child
and of conveying messages in the most effective way. We must
also realize that, even if we do not see immediate results,
we can never know when, and in which situation, the seeds
which we plant early on in a child's life may germinate at a
later stage.
We find (in the Yerushalmi Sanhedrin 10:2) that
Menasheh, when they lit up the fire underneath him, after
having tried invoking the name of every possible avoda
zora in the world, realizing that nothing had worked,
said, "I remember that my father would read to me this verse
in the Beis Haknesses, "In your distress, when all
these things shall come upon you, in the end of days, you
will return to Hashem your G-d and hearken to His voice, for
Hashem Your G-d is a merciful G-d; he will not fail you, nor
destroy you, nor forget the covenant of your fathers, which
He swore to them."
The ministering angels blocked the windows, so that his
prayer should not penetrate, but Hkb"h said, "If I do
not accept him, I would be setting up an obstacle for all
those who repent."
After several decades, the holy words which his father,
Chizkiyohu Hamelech had taught him, burst forth and
had an effect. If I am not mistaken, it is brought down in
the name of the Chofetz Chaim, that we are not obliged to
succeed, but only to act. Paroh's daughter also did not know
that her hand would become so elongated. Our duty is to
constantly act and act and to pray.
The Kedushoh of Chol Hamoed
We have to have simcha which is connected to avodas
Hashem (Shulchan Oruch 529:63), but there is a certain
flexibility about this: "Children should be given parched
ears of corn and nuts, and clothes and jewelry should be
bought for the women according to a person's financial
abilities" (ibid.). Each person is made happy by different
things, but kedusha comes from "simcha which is
connected to avodas Hashem." Naturally, we have to
devote time to limud Torah. We can learn those
commentaries on the Haggodoh which we did not manage to
complete on Seder night, Medrash Shir Hashirim,
explanations on tefillas tal, or material related to
sefiras haomer. Hopefully, children will find these
topical subjects of interest and learn them eagerly.
What about outings on chol hamoed? We already find
Chazal relating to this topic. This is what the Shulchan
Oruch says,"Beis Din is obliged to station policemen
during yomim tovim to roam around and search parks,
orchards and rivers, to ensure that people do not gather
there to eat and drink in mixed company, thereby coming to
sin. In addition, they are to warn the people that men and
women should not mix in their houses during a simcha.
Everybody is to be in a state of kedushoh" (end of
se'if 529).
In the current period, when there is danger involved in
traveling anywhere, we will certainly not go on outings.
Those accustomed to visiting relatives, when this does not
involve any danger, will presumably continue to do so.
The Rambam writes (Yesodei Hatorah, 2:2), "A person
acquires love and fear of Hashem by reflecting upon His
marvelous great deeds and creations. Once a person perceives
Hashem's unlimited wisdom, he immediately loves, praises,
glorifies and is filled with an immense urge to know Hashem
and His greatness."
Rav Wolbe shlita, in his book Zeria Ubinyan
Bechinuch (pg.4), writes that we have to show our
children the beauty of the world. Maybe we do not do this
enough. There is no need to go far in order see the beauties
of nature: we all have access to fruit, and flowers are
available everywhere, both wild and cultivated ones. The
beauty of Creation surrounds us, and all we have to do is to
open our children's eyes to it. Our emunoh has to be
very powerful, and by studying the wonders of nature we
certainly reinforce it.
Rav Yechezkel Levenstein zt"l told me that he
explained to his daughters that Hkb"h supervises the
world, and he would give a small prize to any of them if
they would point out an example of Hashem's hashgocho.
I understood from him that he would teach his daughters
about this at a very young age.
The Chazon Ish zt'l once told his student, Rav Avrohom
Yaakov Weiner, "Sometimes when I look at a plant in my room,
I am forced to stop because of the intensity of my yearning
and awe over the wonders of Hashem's Creation" (Marbitzei
Torah Umusar, vol.2, pg. 301).
We must stress that throughout the year we are limited about
where we can go to on outings, and on the holy days of
chol hamoed we have to be especially careful about
taharas haeinayim, and cannot go to places where
tznius is not adhered to. Moreover, we cannot visit
places (even on a weekday) which are mechalel Shabbos.
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