Those who don't know how to cry -- and those who do...
Two mothers, worlds apart, are a significant part of the
prayers of the Yomim Noroim. They are Rochel Imenu and the
mother of Sisro. Thousands of years have gone by, but what we
are told about their conduct still guides us nowadays.
"She looked through the window and she wailed, the mother of
Sisro." We learn from this wail which she emitted
spontaneously, what the sound of a tekiyo should be.
The laws of blowing the shofar are based on that
erstwhile wailing and sobbing.
Besides this, we learn that an individual does not always need
a subscribed form of prayer, with set words. Sometimes we just
have to trigger off our emotions.
For many years, Sisro's mother had had nachas from her
son, a successful commander in the army. In his way, he loved
her and bore her in mind in his campaigns. He brought back
valuable articles from the spoils of each country as a proof
of his triumph and glory. Suddenly, it all came to an end.
Without warning, she felt an inexplicable fear that perhaps
her euphoric life had come to a finale. The wise princesses
tried to divert her attention from the fact that his runners
were late, but she uttered this `sob.'
What lies behind this ululation? A tremor of the heartstrings,
a quiver of the vocal chords, a feeling of emptiness, a void.
A loss of control over a well regulated life.
What does the terua depict? An impulsive scream after
looking through a blank window, where there is no horizon and
no future. A rude awakening from illusions about victories in
battle and a rough landing into the world of reality.
Sisro's mother did not know how to cry. No one had ever taught
her how to pray, nor to whom to pray. She could just utter
this instinctive, animal- like groan or yelp. On this Yom
Terua, we are admonished to glance through the window and
see the great void. To view reality as it is and realize that
we can take nothing for granted. There is no guarantee that
life will continue on the same even keel; we have to jolt
ourselves awake from our fantasies. On the other hand, trials
and tribulations dogged Rochel Imenu from her youth. She was
always surrounded by deceit, especially when her sister was
exchanged as a bride in her place. Then followed the childless
years of hope and the desperate longing for a child, till she
uttered those terrible words of anguish, "If this is so, I am
as dead." She lived there, surrounded by large happy families
till her final sad end. "Her birth was difficult and she was
buried on the way to Efras which is Beis Lechem." Alone, by
the wayside.
Alone at the crossroads, Rochel Imenu sits and weeps. Her
voice is heard from afar, a signpost of lamentation. Why is
she crying? What is she crying for? She is weeping for her own
sad fate and that of her children. Hers are the cries of a
mother whose sons have left her, who have been captured and
taken into exile. Rochel does not give a sudden yelp. She is
well versed in tragedy. She knows how to cry.
All those weak people, broken in body and spirit converge on
her burial place, which serves as a reminder of whence they
have come and where they are headed. While she waits there, at
the crossroads, she unites them in her solitude, caressing
them with her tears as if to say, "There is yet hope; you will
return."
"And it shall come to pass that on that day a great
shofar will be blown, and the assimilated ones will
arrive from Ashur and the exiled ones from Egypt and they will
bow to Hashem on the holy mountain in Yerusholayim"
(Yeshaya 27).
In Ashur they were `lost.' In Egypt they were `deported.' What
was the difference between the two countries? The Jews had
lived in Ashur for decades. A comfortable life, in beautiful
homes, without any restrictions. But their spiritual life was
poor indeed, until they became assimilated, `lost' to their
country and their religion.
In Egypt they worked as slaves. They were beaten and left
reeling, praying for redemption and freedom from their
exile.
On Rosh Hashona we read about Sora, Rochel and Channa, all
three childless and feeling abandoned. Their husbands had
additional wives and they felt alone and pushed out. But we
are told, "If your exiles be as far as the ends of the
Heavens, I will gather you in from there."
Everyone knows his own shortcomings and worries. We have our
own private `window' to the heart. Some may have health
problems, others may have financial troubles and others may
experience failure, disappointment or bitterness.
Rosh Hashona shakes us up. It jolts us awake. Rosh Hashona
forces us to look to the past and the future, to think of what
the coming year will bring. It awakens feelings of gloom or
despondence, but also gives a hope for tshuva and that
the coming year will be a better one. The way is open for us
all for a complete redemption.
