The parents and teachers of the Ayelet Hashachar chadorim in Beit Shemesh merited a rare opportunity to be admitted into the home of HaRav Gershon Edelstein in Bnei Brak to hear his holy counsel and ideas on chinuch for the benefit of the students of these chadorim.
This unique gathering was headed by the director, HaRav Yosef Citron, the educational principal HaRav Ben Zion Nordman and HaRav Matisyohu Layish, who came to hear messages of guidance and education. Maran welcomed them and conveyed to them over a long period of time the vital fundamentals on the subject of chinuch and Torah dissemination.
He addressed them as follows:
"I will begin with something already familiar, that education through coercion does not work, neither through shouting, nor does it have any positive impact but on the contrary, it can be detrimental for this way, a child will not understand what is expected of him. One cannot educate through intimidation or force, but only through pleasantness.
"The influence of these things depends on the conduct of the home, not just the way the child is treated there but also from the rapport between the parents who conduct themselves through good traits, without quarreling or shouting, or demands, but only through love and friendship just as is written, 'Ve'ohavta lerei'acha" mutual love, as is written in the Torah.
"This is the primary thing which precedes everything in education, that is, what the child sees in the home, that he absorb the practice of positive traits, everything being conducted in a congenial atmosphere, without arguments but only with domestic harmony.
"Regarding chinuch, one must know not to shout at children. If a student misbehaves, one shouldn't raise his voice against him but explain and tell him that such conduct is not advisable. 'If you behave in such a manner, people will speak badly of you and when you grow up and people inquire about you for shidduchim, asking about your character traits, they will also inquire about how you acted as a child.' Therefore you should behave nicely and calmly, to explain this to the child and he should also see this in his home.
He concluded:
"If one lives this way then life at home will be pleasant and the children will grow up educated. When there is love of Torah in the home and good middos and yiras Shomayim in the home. Of course one has to speak about Gehennom. The child should know that there is Gehennom. This is not a cause of worry if the child knows about Gehennom and about Akeidas Yitzchok and self-sacrifice. This is the way of Torah,"
