After the spiritual high of Yom Kippur, we are ready for a
mitzvah that involves us totally. And Succos really
fills the bill. Dwelling in the succah is one of the
few mitzvos that we can do with every part of our
body. The walls of the succah wrap around us and the
s'chach is above our heads. We can eat, sleep, learn
and entertain guests in the succah huts that are
specially constructed and decorated for use during the
holiday.
One of the other all-encompassing mitzvos is yishuv
Eretz Yisrael, settling the land of Israel. Aliyah from
English-speaking countries has picked up. Recently we have
had the pleasure of welcoming planes full of "Anglo" new
immigrants. When I was speaking to the mother of a family
that had just arrived, it suddenly dawned on me that I am now
an "old-timer" since it is about ten years since my family
stopped shuttling back and forth and started calling Israel
"home."
I got to wondering about the transition from new-immigrant to
old-timer status. One of the first things I noted was that in
the past year or so I have found myself reaching for Israeli
products in the grocery store, even if they are side by side
with their American counterparts. When we first arrived, I
thought that tomato sauce absolutely had to come ready-made
in a can or jar. Now, it is second nature to buy tomato paste
and make my own.
Even more important than that, I have stopped thinking, "If
only the Israelis would do things like . . . ." You can fill
in the blank with "us" "Americans" or any other subset of
your choice. America is technologically advanced and we were
used to easy living with lots of gadgets, but that doesn't
mean that we had a better life when we lived in the
States.
The American influences on our children were horrendous. I
remember when the store right next to our kosher grocery was
rented out to a video chain. From that moment on, we had to
start parking at the other end of the shopping center and
walk back to the grocery in order to avoid anyone in the
family looking at the dreadful posters in the window of the
video store.
But we were used to certain things that we had in the States,
and therefore they became the norms by which we measured the
Israeli equivalents. We couldn't help comparing schools. In
the States, our sons attended the local Jewish Day School
which had Jewish studies half a day and secular studies for
the other half.
It took some time to adjust to the idea that my youngest son
was not going to know any math past long division. I used to
wince when he and his fourth grade friends went to the
grocery would look quizzically at the date on a yogurt. They
did not know where in the secular calendar we were holding so
they could not tell if the current day was before or after
the yogurt's expiration date.
It was "normal" for some of our Anglo friends to make
comments like, "I wish the kids here would learn more secular
subjects." Also, "Why don't they give the kids here P.E.
(physical education)? What would be so terrible if they put
up a basketball hoop over there in the corner of the
cheder playground?" It was okay to think these things
and to say them to each other.
The problems came up when they tried to explain them to
Israelis, especially those in charge of the school system.
The new immigrants thought these were wonderful suggestions
that would be acted upon as soon as they voiced them. The
Israelis thought they were outlandish ideas they had already
heard from other Anglos and already rejected out of hand.
There was definitely no meeting of the minds.
Now, from a perspective of ten years worth of hindsight, I
can give you a moshol to explain what was happening
back then: Just before my youngest son returned to yeshiva at
the end of this summer's vacation, he and some of his friends
wanted to get together. I suggested they do so over the noon
meal. I was making a big pan of lasagna for a send- off
dinner for my son and he could invite his friends to join
us.
To make the occasion festive, I asked my son to run down and
buy a liter of ice cream to serve for dessert. It was the end
of the ice cream season and the only plastic tub of ice cream
available was chocolate chip. Now in the States, chocolate
chip ice cream is vanilla ice cream with the addition of the
type of chocolate morsels that one uses in baking chocolate
chip cookies.
However, the ice cream company here had taken a bittersweet
chocolate bar and either ground it or processed it in a food
processor until it turned into mighty small pieces. The ice
cream base was rich, top quality vanilla ice cream. The
chocolate bar that had been pulverized was top quality
candy.
However, the combination of the two was a fiasco. Ice cream
has three basic qualities. It is cold, sweet and creamy. This
ice cream was cold and sweet. But the texture was far from
creamy. I think "gritty" would have been a more apt
description. Sometimes when we mix two wonderful things the
result is far from ideal. That was true of the ice cream and
is equally true of efforts to incorporate certain Western
ideas into Israeli culture.
Let me give you another example. In California, where we
lived before our move to Israel, homes have a master bedroom.
This is always the largest bedroom in the house and almost
always has an en suite bathroom. Often it also boasts a
parent's retreat which is a room-sized alcove next to a walk-
in closet.
Our house in the States was not particularly fancy and
therefore we had the smallest of California master bedrooms.
It didn't have a retreat or walk-in closet, but it was a
comfortable room. The master bath was also modest by local
standards, but it had a Pullman counter, built-in drug
cabinets and a good sized stall shower enclosed in glass.
The builder who put up our Israeli building advertised it as
"American style." Therefore, our apartment has a master
bedroom. After taking off space for the tiny bathroom, the
master bedroom is really small. To start with, it was the
smallest bedroom in the house. That makes sense from a
logical standpoint, since there are two occupants in a master
bedroom and hopefully several children in each of the other
bedrooms.
Our master bathroom has such a small area designated for the
shower that we had to install a small plastic sliding door to
partition it off. Otherwise, the Friday afternoon shower
could have served two purposes—-to get the person who
is showering ready for Shabbos and to wash down the entire
bathroom at the same time!
Israeli master bedrooms just do not lend themselves to taking
away a portion for a bathroom. The Israeli master bedroom
concept of a small room for the parents is a good idea. The
American idea of a bathroom in the master bedroom is a good
idea. Combining the two just doesn't work. Fortunately,
neither my husband nor I suffer from claustrophobia. We have
gotten used to our cozy quarters, and we can actually laugh
about it now.
The adjustment to living here is behind us. As long-term
residents, we have come to appreciate the many wonderful
things that are inherent in living in Eretz Yisrael. Now each
year when we emerge from our succah and go back to our
Israeli apartment, we are truly going home.
