Many years ago, when my oldest was about nine or ten months
old and had discovered the new world of standing upright, he
found a bag of cocoa which I kept in a corner on a basket
stand on wheels. Being normally curious, he took it and
dumped some of the contents on the floor. I took the cocoa
away, washed up his hands and went on with my business. About
three days later, I noticed that there in the corner still
lay that cocoa mess. "Why doesn't anyone clean it up?" I
thought to myself, and then it dawned that I was that person
who was suppose to clean it up.
Over the years, I have struggled to keep order in my house.
If you are a naturally orderly person, then this column is
probably not for you, but on second thought, it may open your
eyes to what the rest of us have to go through. To start off,
I think I am right when I suggest that most messy people
don't actually enjoy looking at mess. They just don't see it
at all. In other cases, the not-so neat person just doesn't
know how to relate to the mess — i.e. clean it up! A
friend recently told me about her former roomate. My friend
who is a neatbug had gone away for some amount of time and
the roomate was on her own in the apartment. The roomate
noticed a coffee mug on the table and wondered what it was
doing there as she passed by. This happened several times a
day for a few days until reality sank in.
I know that, for myself, I have always been great at the big
jobs. I'm really in my element when it comes to Pesach or
"nesting" for a new baby. It was the upkeep where I was and
still am weaker. As a girl, my mother would nag me to clean
up my desk for weeks/months on end. When I'd finally get down
to it, I'd actually enjoy the challenge of making order out
of such a riproaring mess. Getting rid of unnecessary piles
of papers, throwing away unusable school supplies, and
straightening out the rest. I'd promise myself that this was
the way I'd keep my desk always, but of course, I never
did.
So not being so naturally neat, I had to develop ways to keep
up with the balagan. Once things get too out of hand,
then the task would appear absolutely impossible. Because I'm
what you might call a reformed slob, I may have ideas that
could help others in a similar position.
I'd to give some simple ideas how to get motivated when the
mess seems to overwhelm. One of the hardest areas of house
cleaning, especially when there are a number of people living
under one roof and even more especially when some of them are
under the age of ten, is getting rid of stuff lying around on
the floor or on furniture.
"Stuff" can be: books, school supplies, papers, dishes, cups,
toys, tools, tapes and more. Being somewhat mathematical, I
always loved working with numbers and so when there were just
too many things lying about, I'd count. At first it would be
until the number ten. Once I saw that I'd actually picked up
ten things, it would encourage me to really get going. Even
now, when I have a big mess on my hands but I also have a
number of jobs to take care of simultaneously (meals to make,
laundry to deal with, etc.) I'll give myself an amount that I
want to get cleaned up just so that some semblance of order
will begin to appear.
I've used counting items clean-up in other ways also. Games
that you can do yourself or do with the kids. I give myself
two minutes on the clock and see how many things I can get
picked up. It's a good work out and there is the feeling of
accomplishment. Similarly, you can put on a tape and see how
much you can pick up to your favorite song. It puts everyone
in a good mood. (Make sure to use upbeat music.)
I don't do these things so much now because I'm more
disciplined about getting things cleaned up and moving on to
other tasks but there were other number games I'd play to
motivate the mess clean up. Comparing how many things in this
room versus another or rewarding myself to read a good short
story if I'd clean up a certain amount of items lying around.
As time went by I found I was motivated to raise the number.
Even later, the reward was the tidy room itself.
Lately I've done some similar games with my kids. I like to
have things tidied up before my husband walks in, although he
is thankfully not so particular about this himself. After a
long afternoon of Legos, coloring, homework, reading etc.,
the living room is chaotic, so I tell the kids, "OK, everyone
pick up X amount of things," depending on the amount of mess.
Then I usually will do the same. If they start to complain,
then I'll keep picking up and counting and they get the
message that I am doing even more than they.
I've got some other ideas on how to make cleaning up easier.
Never forget that truly lazy people almost always end up
working harder in the end.
