There's something on my mind, but I forget what it is. I've
always considered my mind one of my better features. But now
I seem to be losing it. The guy at the health food store gave
me some vitamin B pills to take. He says they increase blood
flow to the brain, but I keep forgetting to take them.
A good friend tells me it's age and that she also keeps going
into a room and forgetting what she went in there for. But
I'm only in my early forties and I don't have that many
rooms. My naturopath says it's stress. But I've always been
stressed and although my responsibilites have grown over the
years, so has my ability to handle them. So that should even
itself out, shouldn't it?
It's frustrating to put something down and two minutes later,
not remember where I put it and five minutes later, not
remember what I was looking for. It's distressing since I do
most of my work with my mind. What was I saying...? Right.
It's a little late in my life to start relying on other
muscles and appendages in my body to take over the workload.
I needn't worry. I do have insurance if, for some reason, G-d
forbid, I can't work. Whatever it is. But it's disconcerting
when I consider what lies ahead if this is happening now. It
boggles the mind.
Most people fear losing their minds because no one takes you
seriously if you're a blithering idiot. If you say, "I have
half a mind..." and mean it, you really don't have a leg to
stand on. My mind is where a lot of good stuff is stored: my
ideas, my emotions, my memories. Of course, there's some bad
stuff there, too. Unfortunately, for some reason, that's the
last thing I forget. It would be nice if, for example, I
could forget a slight. But being slight, it doesn't take up
much room...
As a teacher, I need to have all my faculites. As a writer,
my mind can't be a blank page. As a mother, I need to
remember what to remind my son not to forget. Have I used up
all my gray cells already? Maybe it's a case of mind over
gray matter. I don't do any of that stuff that kills off
brain cells and I speak several languages, which is said to
increase brain mass.
The truth is, I have a lot on my mind, so if I forget a thing
or two, it can only relieve the burden. Mind you, I need to
bear in mind the fact that I am only human. Maybe I'm
expecting too much of myself. Perhaps I could convince my
computer technician to give ME a memory upgrade. I don't
think there was that much to remember before computers, but
actually, I forget what it was like.
I'm sure everyone has a point. This temporary amnesia that
hits me a dozen or so times a day is probably just the
combination of stress and aging, sleep deprivation and lack
of proper nutrients that affect many of us and the fact that
I keep forgetting to take that little pink pill.
Maybe I should simply take a vacation. But I'm of two minds
about that. I'll have to think about it later.
Just remind me...
