It's that time of the year again, the unmentionable
time when you're supposed to go about your unmerry way with a
sigh, commiserating with each neighbor you meet on the
stairway or by the grocer's, and reassuring one another that
"everyone makes it to the finish line, the seder so
let's just project ourselves that far and assume that we will
make it too."
Is this the attitude we are supposed to have, that we are in
bondage until we get to that calendar Festival of Freedom,
the stereotyped fixation that Hashem has inflicted a month-
long erev Pesach as a taste of slavery?
So many things are all in the mind, all in the attitude, and
I think it's time we changed our view on the preparation
period to regard it as a special privilege. This is the time
of renewal, of pushing ourselves very far and taking some
pride and giving lots of credit to Heavenly assistance. It's
the time for overhaul, and who/what does not need an annual
overhaul to clear cobwebs of all sorts. It's also the time of
family bonding, if you approach it correctly, of tackling a
big challenge and seeing it through, and taking permissible
pride in a job well done while thanking Hashem for making it
possible.
It is not a punishment from Above but a privilege beyond the
duty.
Planning Ahead, Realistically
One of the first rules is not to compare your progress with
that of your neighbors or sisters-in-law etc. You can take
tips if you like but plan things your own way.
I'm a morning bird, for example, and comes `that time of the
year,' I find myself getting up very early, accomplishing
worlds, and collapsing at night earlier than my usual
bedtime, only to wake up progressively earlier. It seems as
if my biological clock readjusts itself to a 23-hour day
cycle. So what do I do? I take advantage of those precious
hours when I am full of vigor, and do those jobs that require
full-steam-ahead energy. I see no point in staying up late if
what has to be finished up will take me a quarter of the time
the next morning. And when my biological clock has taken me
to a ridiculous hour of waking up at 3 a.m., for example, I
will re-readjust it by a short nap between 6.am. and 7 a.m.
Ultimately, Shabbos readjusts it anyway.
On the other hand, my married daughters tell me that if they
as much as go into the kitchen for a five a.m. coffee, the
whole house is up, arms-outstretched for their bottle or
chocolate milk, and raring to help Ima. No go. She burns her
candle at the other end. Another daughter takes a nap at
eight p.m., gets up at eleven and does her stint until one or
two.
Work when it suits you best. Don't work when it is
counterproductive!
So much for the timing. How about the master plan?
I never start until after Purim and then work intensively. I
divide everything in my head: a master plan which breaks the
house into rooms, which I clean thoroughly from start to
finish and post a "Clean for Pesach, Rabbanit Supervision"
sign, and then that room is out of chometz bounds. I
personally don't see the point in piecemeal work, leaving
access to eating when the closets have already been done. A
major effort and finish! One big room, one little room, one
big room, one little room, leaving the living room for next-
to-last and kitchen for last, of course, with forays into the
kitchen all the time, a shelf here and there to boost the
morale when I finally get to the kitchen and see that lots of
it has already been done.
I divide each room into a grid in my mind and tackle the top
level, working my way down, thoroughly and relentlessly,
until the whole room is done, walls to floor. Floors will, of
course, get another final scrubbing towards the end, with the
final change of bed linen, but children must brush themselves
off before entering a completed room, and the sign on the
door is there as a reminder.
Atmosphere, Tempo
Play music, by all means, with a lively tempo. Hum along,
keep the spirits up. Have frequent coffee breaks, pizza
interludes, changes of pace. Chocolate is a great energy
boost, no matter what Rabbi Zobin says! Alternate difficult
tasks with easy ones, sitting jobs with energetic ones,
chores you enjoy interspersed with those you enjoy less. But
make a superhuman attempt to enjoy this whole process by
keeping your good humor throughout.
This is the time to see how your children have grown, and
what new tasks they can tackle this year. LET THEM CHOOSE THE
JOBS THEY ENJOY and give them a free hand -- after explaining
the purpose of the task (to clean for chometz and not
necessarily dust) and giving them the proper tools and
methods to get it done.
NEVER delegate or take on too much at one shot. One
shelf and some praise, another shelf and some more praise
without leaving loose ends. Your own mental grid should also
take time/energy into account in a realistic projection of
what you can accomplish in X amount of time.
TAKING BREAKS can include shopping, which should be a reward
for an intensive or extensive job well done, completed. Look
forward to these outings and take the kids along. Breaks
should certainly include picnic lunches somewhere in the
fresh air and sun, which does wonders to clear away
cobwebs.
A planned break can include a family caucus on planning
chol hamoed. Children can cut out or collect ideas of
outings from newspapers or booklets (an excellent one is put
out by the Shomrei Shabbos organization).
This is also the time to purchase new reading books for the
family -- to be read on Pesach. Some families lock away their
reading books, so make sure you stock up on new ones. The
purchase can be a real reward for work well done.
Include the children in plans about the house: rearranging or
buying furniture (you can go and buy used or have children
shop for bargains in the paper), adding shelves, switching
rooms, making new curtains, buying some new pictures,
painting, contact-papering and other home decorating
ideas.
Make a trip to your local plant nursery and give each child a
flower-in-a-pot to care for. Buy yourself some indoor/outdoor
plants to brighten up the house and window sills.
Enjoy this marvelous time of year for bonding, renewal,
overhaul, mental and domestic. Make lots of jokes, have lots
of fun. Get to know your kids better.
Don't miss out on all the opportunities. After all, next
Pesach is over a full year away...
