Dei'ah veDibur - Information & Insight
  

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26 Tishrei 5760 - October 6, 1999 | Mordecai Plaut, director Published Weekly
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HOME & FAMILY

Developing Constructive Communication Between Parents and Children
by Rabbi Yaakobson, well known educator and lecturer

The first basic rule in communication: Listening. Understanding the world of the child is acquired through listening; this is the basis for a positive bond between him and the parents and this, in turn, enables the parents to educate their child and have him accept their guidance and guide rules and to execute them in the manner which will satisfy them.

Thoughts After the Shiva of Two Boys Who Went Up in Fire in Their Succa on Hoshana Rabba
by Rivka O., Ramat Shlomo

Since my husband passed away a few years ago, leaving me with small children to take care of, I have made it a practice to go and comfort mourners.

To my great sorrow, these have been many, many people I knew who needed comfort. I have heard of many incidents with one repetitive theme: all those who passed away were special individuals, among the best of their community. They were in the middle of lives dedicated with an unusual intensity to the service of Hashem. The families were also unique in the way they accepted the terrible blow.


How to Deal With Nightowls
by R. Chadshai

I am a mother of five children, the oldest of whom is seven and a half and the youngest, a year old. The oldest, and his five-year-old sister, are in the habit of waking up at night and crawling into my bed. I have tried many different ways to wean them, through rewards and punishments, but have only had temporary successes...I wake up in the morning exhausted and would like your advice on this problem.

Letters, Eitzes, Feedback
To daven in shul or...

From H.S., Yerushalayim (excerpted)

It is her first baby and she is at her mother's home, finding out first-hand that caring for a child is wholly encompassing and time consuming, be it feeding, burping, changing, or even just holding the baby. And she wonders how she will be able to fit all the other daily chores of the first-year newlywed, also time consuming at this stage, into her schedule.

Keeping In Touch
by Malka Adler

A 14-year-old son's going off to yeshiva ketana is an event that evokes a myriad of emotions in his mother, all the more if he is the last son down the line. There's gratitude to Hashem that her bar-mitzva bochur has reached such an important milestone: leaving home, living in a dormitory and learning in a secluded yeshiva setting.

Poet's Corner
Cheshvon
by A. Ross

How I love this month of Cheshvon, people says it's just routine,
Not a yom tov nor a fast day, not a scope for haute cuisine,
The house seems really quiet, all the kids are back at school,
The days are not so hot now and the nights are rather cool.

*

How I love this month of Cheshvon, though there is no special date,
No panic yet for Pesach, nothing yet to celebrate,
No urge to fry up doughnuts or those latkes, if you must,
(Who thought up all those greasy foods for which we seem to lust?)

*

How I love this month of Cheshvon, when all the strain is past,
Fantastic days of prayer, and our most holy Fast,
The `build-up' until Succos, Tishrei now seems a dream,
And now that it is over, `just' Shabbos reigns supreme.

*

How I love this month of Cheshvon with its longer Friday nights,
The tranquil after-dinner time beside the Shabbos lights,
All troubles seem to vanish, even children seem more calm,
My house becomes a palace, safe from every kind of harm.

*

How I love the months of Kislev, yes, Teves and Shevat,
Each season is quite special, I never doubted that,
But each year when it's Cheshvon, I somehow feel relaxed,
A feeling of contentment, and ease. Not overtaxed.


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